Who says the American Dream is the way to be (Part 2)
I took the leap of faith to try something new and become a student again. To leave my husband for the longest we have ever been apart and journey on my own. I knew I could do it. That wasn’t my fear.
My fear was; Am I making the right choice?
A lot happened in 2017. My anxiety snowballed and I wasn’t prepared. I had a nervous breakdown, I spoke to therapists, hired life coaches, tried acupuncture, medication, altered diets, journaling, crystals, reiki. You name it. I was on a mission to self-heal and reconnect with me, the true me.
Some days I felt progress other days I couldn’t even answer the phone without my heart palpitating. The rollercoaster of emotions was a painful habit to break. I knew the only way I was truly going to self-heal was to leave what I know. So I did.
I signed up for Marianne Wells School of Yoga back in April of 2017.
What made me choose this school?
To be honest, it was one of the only schools that had a two-week program. Through research, most program abroad ranged between the 4-8 week time span. Local courses took 6 months with weekend commitments. I knew I needed a change, but I couldn’t afford to invest in these timeframes.
Amazingly enough, Marianne’s program cost nearly the same as local studios. That price tag also included my flight, dorm, and 3 meals a day, all while being immersed in the jungles of Costa Rica.
When you come across a gem like that, it’s easy to say SIGN ME UP!
The price was right and the timing was feasible. I didn’t care what type of yoga she was teaching or the curriculum. I cared about getting away and time alone, the certification was just an added bonus.
Dec 1st came and I embarked on my journey cutting ties with everything I was comfortable with at home.
“I hope I’m not surrounded by a bunch of kids fresh out of college, overly ambitious about yoga”
I’m so far removed from that mentality, my reason for attending was on a deeper level. I don’t want to make friends, I am happy with the ones I have. I just want to go and work on myself, build a new routine, learn new techniques, return happy.
Typical Cyd, already planning to go into isolation.
I arrived in San Jose, Costa Rica the day before training begins. Our private yoga Facebook group quickly blows up with other eager students arriving and wanting to connect. I cringed and ignored my phone. I made two connections prior to leaving and we all welcomed the idea of rooming together. That was enough for me to handle in one day.
Day one, we hopped on our 4-hour shuttle ride to the Goddess Garden Retreat near Limón. Four hours is a lot of time so the pressure to chit chat loomed.
Lights on Cyd, time to put on the extrovert face.
To my surprise, I was getting a better vibe than anticipated. The majority of the group was older than me, from all parts of the world, holding well-off careers.
Interesting…And you want to teach yoga? Why?
I was intrigued because it was my first time thinking, “maybe I’m not alone?”
The Goddess Garden was as nice as its name implies. Beautifully laid out in the jungle with pathways that lead you throughout. Positive signage surrounded by large bright flowers and leaves the size of your entire upper body. The sounds of howling monkeys rumble deep through the forest line while toucans peacefully fly between the trees.
It consisted of several areas, the living quarters. (I stayed in a 6 person dorm)
The main path led you to the pool and outdoor dining area.
Another to the yoga classroom and pagoda.
Small trails took you to beautiful sights like a frog pond or the goddess tree.
And a 5 minutes walk outside of the resort brings you to a secluded beach perfect for sunrise.
“This is my life for the next two weeks?”
The world is simply beautiful.
The Earth is so welcoming.
I am going to quiet my mind here.
I know I am going to find me.
How I did, wasn’t what I was expecting…